How to deal with the negativity of others?

Question: How can I deal with my negative and critical husband?

        Because of our recessive economy, many people feel depressed and show a negative attitude that effects their relationships. Often people do not even recognize that their financial problems and stress at work influences their mood. Individuals closest to them, like family and friends, are most often the ones that suffer the most under the negativity and the criticism of their loved ones.

        How can you deal with the negativity of someone close to you?

First, you have to understand that the negativity of someone else only effects you if you allow it. Many of us have been criticized during our childhood childhood. Our parents meant well, but often put their own negativity and feelings of inadequacy on us. Therefore, many of us are very sensitive to criticism, especially if it is something that we subconsciously believe is true. For example, if your parents told you that you are lazy, you will be more sensitive when told that you don't work hard enough, even if there is no truth to the accusation..

       Therefore, one can often knows from their reaction to a certain criticism if there are insecurities that exist. One must work on letting go of these irrational beliefs, which they are subconsciously holding on to and then the negative remarks will not cause the same reaction or perhaps not at all. Comments about you  only have the power that you let them have over you.

Childhood Drama

 Question:  How does childhood drama effect my life as an adult and how can you help me to let go of the unwanted feelings associated with my past experiences?

        Painful experiences from childhood may include rejection, neglect, criticisms and emotional or physical abuse. All of us want to be happy, successful and healthy. Negative beliefs such as: I'm not worthy, I'm not good enough, I don't deserve to be treated better, I'm not safe, or other similar destructive thought patterns may interfere with achieving our goals. Therefore, it is important to identify the origins of traumas and to realize where they originated to effectively clear them out.

        As a therapist, I can help you to discover negative repetitive thought patterns. I work with my client's on understanding that their assumptions often lead them to unproductive behavior. My treatment interventions include the exploration of the relationship between my client's irrational thoughts and the feelings that are related to them. By doing so, I can help my clients to realize and change their negative beliefs and maladaptive behaviors.

    

Financial Problems

Question: How can a life couch help me with financial problems?


        A life coach will work with you to explore possibilities and to create your action plan for success.
Goal setting and customized strategies are important tools to overcome your  difficulties. A life coach also challenges you to move beyond your perceived limitations, helps you improve your self-confidence and encourages you to look forward to a positive future without making excuses for your inactivity.
Talking about your stress, anxieties and feelings of depression is not just health for your mind and body but it also can help you to discover answers to your problems.

Life Coach

What does a Life Coach do?
A Life Coach is someone who helps you to explore future goals and life directions. She customizes strategies and action plans with you for success.
She also works with you on
             - improving your relationships
             -organization of your life
             -self-confidence
             -self-management

             -exploration of possibilities

             -challenging limitations

A Life Coach also helps you to discover answers to your problems and listen to your ideas.

Giving Advice

Question for Regina: Why does a therapist not specifically tell me what I should do when I have a problem.

The only true way of helping somebody is by teaching him to help himself. "You can give somebody who is hungry a fish but it is much better if you teach him how to catch his own fish."


A good therapist will not solve problems for you, but help and support you in finding the answer to your problem yourself. By doing so, she can ensure you do not become dependent on her.
As a therapist I try to improve my clients self-esteem by making them independent and self-reliant. I do this by teaching them to see their problems from a different perspective and help them find new possibilities to deal with difficult situations.

Question of the day for Regina

Question:  How do I deal with the daily problems that come into my life? by Lynn. Woodland Hills,CA


Answer:  Problems can be seen as a setback but in reality it is a possibility to change your life. It can be looked upon as a wonderful thing or as my mother said, "It's a new opportunity for  improving one's life." Problems force us to think about circumstances and our behavior associated with this situation. By dealing with our problems using a positive mental attitude we can change things in our lives and grow as individuals. Growing and learning is the reason for living. Therefore be thankful for every problem because it gives you the opportunity to improve and mature as human being.

Regina
Email your questions to Croregina@yahoo.com
They will be answered and posted within 48 hours.